My Mother Was Right

I haven’t written anything here for a while.

I seem to have completely ended my emotional attachment to this individual, who held my heart for twenty-five years.

I can clearly see exactly where the devaluing and discarding phases began in both phases of our relationships.

I understand that there was never anything good in him but youth, and my memories of him when he was young.

The freshness of his youth posed as purity; he has always been a pathological liar posing as a nice guy.

In short, my Mother (rest her soul) was right when she declared to me (when I was 18) in 1986: “What can you possibly see in him? He’ll never be anything but a small town druggie.”

She was right.

Anything else I ever believed that he was- was merely a delusional combination of his acting along with my imagination.



6 thoughts on “My Mother Was Right

  1. A tough realization. It was painful having to acknowledge how often I created in a person what I wanted them to be, reflecting myself in them, instead of seeing them for what they were. Don’t be too hard on yourself.

  2. Ahhh, Ixchel. I am so glad to see your heart is healing. It takes a long time especially in cases like ours. And please don’t think “partnering” is not for you in this lifetime. It is, and in so many ways. Through spirit, through nature and through your children, friends and all of us here. I believe, and this is true for me as well, that when we are one with the Universe a “partner”, will float into our lives effortlessly. Because that partner will also be one with the Universe and with ours. That is the Tao.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s